错过。爱过。

 看了大家在网上讨论得沸沸扬扬的《你的婚礼》，我领悟到的两大重点 - 错过，爱过。

错过

电影里，周潇齐和尤咏慈在中学时期错过后，大学时期相遇了。
在大学时期错过后，在成人的社会又相遇了。

难怪每一次电影，电视剧开头都要写着 “如有雷同，纯属巧合”。

因为现实生活中，错过，很多时候就是永远地错过了。

爱过

电影里，周潇齐和尤咏慈都爱过。
可是尤咏慈最后爱着的已经不是周潇齐。

所谓“爱过”，它就是过去式，不是现在式，更不是未来式。

那么轰轰烈烈的爱过，可最后和他/她携手步入礼堂的人不是你，会恨吗？

心里会揪一下吗？

虽然说电影情节纯属虚构，但现实生活中每一天不也是很多人在经历着错过和爱过吗？
就像我错过你，爱过他。

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电影里有两句令我觉得特别扎心的话。

1. 我不知道，从未拥有过，和拥有后又失去了，哪个更痛。

我觉得“拥有后又失去了”更痛吧。曾经拥有，那个人的习惯和喜好，也可能成为你的习惯和喜好，而他/她的影子也会隐隐出现在你的生活里。

曾经，那张沙发上，那张餐桌上坐着的我们，现在只有我。

曾经，那间浴室里，挂着的是我们的毛巾，放着的是我们的牙刷，现在只有我的。

从未拥有过，就没有这些曾经，可能没那么痛吧。

2. 我看过你所有的样子，开心的，不开心的，现在就是想再看看，你从今以后都不属于我了的样子。

曾经以为他/她今后的样子，快乐的，伤心的，布满皱纹的，都是你将面对的。

多少人想过有一天你面对的是他/她从今以后都不属于你了的样子？

不告而别

写上瘾了，继续。
反正也没人看，不是吗？

记得你曾说过，人与人之间最重要的是沟通。

对，有事就说，有屁就放。

那为什么选择不告而别？

无意间听见你的消息，还是没忍住，发了信息给你。
你没回复。
看见你上线，你始终没回复。

不知什么原因，就这样断了联系。

终是不经意看着反向的交通，终是盼望着在路上可以看见熟悉的身影。
因为我想知道 你还在吗？

一次，两次，三次

是这地方太大吗？大得我们都没机会在路上相遇？
还是我们根本没有缘分？

慢慢淡忘。
但还是害怕无法招架父母突如其来的问候。
“你们怎么好像没联系了？”

我该怎么回答？我也在揣摩着其中的答案。

偶然在社交媒体上看见你的消息，原来你早已横渡那太平洋。

哦，原来你选择了不告而别。

那你说的沟通，是在社交媒体上没有温度的交流吗？

那我明白了。

你好，就好。 

冰山终究结成冰山。
中间那段温暖融化的日子，那段送礼物，送关心的日子，
应该只是短暂夏天的幸福吧。

不怪冰山，怪这夏天。。
是这夏天时冷时热，阴晴不定。

如果说 这夏天理清一切，准备用最温暖的阳光来融化冰山，
冰山还会选择给夏天一次融化他的机会吗？

我会等，但我有资格吗？

而你，会给我一个等的机会吗？

迟来的抱歉

想一想，好像重来没有真正跟他说声抱歉。

是那该死的自尊?
还是那不敢承认错误的灵魂? 

鼓起勇气，说了 “hey"。 
突如其来的问候，有点牵强。

他久不回复，是在忙？
是不想记起我们的过去？
还是早已有预感我无事不登三宝殿？

只好鼓起第二次勇气。

开口承认我的错误，说出迟来的对不起。

对，迟了好多好多年。

把理由推向“因为疫情，不想将来有一天后悔没有说出抱歉”，
其实是“不想将来有一天后悔没有说出抱歉”。
不管疫情的事，它只是一个用来掩饰我无法完全卸下自尊的借口。

也不知道他接不接受？
毕竟文字上的对不起，不可能比亲口说出的对不起 有温度。

他没回复。

是因为我在信息里说“你可以不必回复”？
还是他压根就没想回复？

开始不再执着于无法控制的事。
也不再做出无畏的猜测。

算了吧，只要他一切安好，就好。:)

阔别九年的友情

从前的深蓝色校裙校裤

我们别着的是同样的校徽

我们唱着的是同样的校歌

我们奔跑的是同一片草场

我们奔向的却是不同的未来

五年的中学生涯

我的回忆里没有你

你的回忆里也没有我

对你的印象

只停留在顶着陆军头，穿着深蓝色校裤的样子

我们都错过了好多好多

偶然的一次相遇

我们开始联络

可是冰山依旧没有融化

再次联络，一起搞活动

冰山开始融化了一些

我以为我们就这样结束

很庆幸，并没有

“在对的时间，遇见对的人，是一生幸福； 在对的时间，遇见错的人，是一场心伤； 在错的时间，遇见错的人，是一段荒唐； 在错的时间，遇见对的人，是一阵叹息。”

对，是一阵叹息。

但我希望下一次，是一生幸福。

P/S. 3年前写的，如今才有勇气发布。不知道你会不会看见，也不知道看见这则文章的你会不会知道我文章里的主角是你。

Thank You.

We all have friends for reasons.

"A true friend is the greatest of all blessings."

Here I'm going to show my gratitude to a very important friend in my life.

Nothing much to say, but a THANK YOU will do.

THANKS for always giving me advice. Those advice might seem to be nothing for you, but it really helps a lot.

THANKS for being a good listener to me. I know sometimes I might get little bit annoying, sorry but yeah, you still listen to me with patience.

THANKS for appreciating me as a good friend. 

THANKS for accepting me with all my flaws.

THANKS for everything. :)

I feel really lucky to have friend like you.

I'm blessed.

Make our friendship last forever. Friendship never ends.

Xie Xie. 

It means thank you in mandarin.

P/s. Need not to mention who is this, you know yourself.

THE END

Almost every guy that said they love me, leave me.

Don't say the word 'LOVE' unless you really understand its meaning.
Don't say the word 'FOREVER' unless you are really sure about it.
Don't give me hope unless you can really do it.

It hurts.

Being abandoned for times, I'm afraid of falling in love.

To my dear ex,

Why I leave? ASK YOURSELF.

"We are not suitable."
That's the sentence I always use to persuade myself.
That's what I told my mother when she asked me about this.

Please stop giving me hope.
Please stop caring about me.
Please stop posting those status that show your regret.
Please stop all these nonsense.

You should know that we can't go back to those sweet moments.
You should know that I won't hold your hand again. That hand is not mine anymore.
You should know that I won't be your bowling partner anymore.

Anyway, I still have to say thank you.
Thanks for guiding me along my journey of life.
Thanks for introducing me to bowling.
Thanks for accompanying me throughout the food hunting journey.
Thanks for giving me a lot of sweet memories.

We should come to an end.
Stay sweet with her.
Just one request from me, never ever forget about me.

I promise myself, this is the last post for you.

OUR STORY END HERE.

Stars can't shine without darkness

Still remember that feeling when I saw you holding her hand.
That feeling sucks!

I tried so hard to forget about you.
Forget those moments where we used to be so sweet.
Forget those sweet talks you talked to me.
Forget everything about you.

I deleted every conversation we had.
Whatsapp, WeChat, Telegram, Line
But I forget there is one called Facebook Messenger,
the social networking that we first started our conversation.

I always say "I'm okay", "I'm alright", "Don't worry about me"
I always smile, I always laugh so hard
But no one knows what is happening in my heart.
It is bleeding. Non-stop-bleeding.
It is too difficult for me to move on, to let go, to forget.
I need times, plenty of times.

I already tried so hard to avoid myself from both of you.
And yet you want to walk towards me while holding her hands.
And yet you say sorry while taking her into your arms.
FYI.

Please, leave me alone.

My friend once told me, "We all have friends for a reason."

Thanks for listening to me. Thanks for giving advice.

I will move on, not a big step, but I will start with a tiny one.

Perhaps one day I am strong enough to say

 "Thanks for being so cruel to me. You have made me a better and stronger one." 

Stars can't shine without darkness.

With the darkness you gave, I believe that I can shine bright in the sky.